Recognising negative self-talk, and releasing its intensity.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me…”

Sorry, I call BS! 

Our words can be a weapon and one we so easily use against ourselves but here’s what I’ve learned…

The sticks and stones rhyme was intended to comfort and reassure me when I was a kid being bullied at school but it simply isn’t true. As the bullying continued into my teens it was the words hurled at me and the thoughts in my head that had the biggest impact on how I was feeling.

Sadly, those words stick, those feelings take hold, they become beliefs and they get buried deep. It’s only in my 30s that I'm learning to unravel them…

Deciding to promote positive change in the way we talk about and understand mental health and simultaneously build a community for Big Love Movement have ended up being both hugely empowering and deeply unsettling for me.

Fear of people thinking I’m showing off, or judging me and my decisions, and hearing the words “Who does she think she is” in my head is enough to make me want to give up, shut my mouth, run and hide!

As difficult as I find it sometimes I know I have to find a way to move through the discomfort and overcome those overwhelming emotions. 

I don’t need to “get over it” or “pull myself together”, I need to accept where I am right now and be kind to myself.

This is what I’m here for; to share big love and help myself and others move through life’s challenges and emotional wobbles with more ease, connection and compassion.

Being kind to myself means I dig deep and do the inner work.

I delve into my spiritual satchel and choose the tools and rituals that ignite a spark of self-belief in me and I nurture it daily so I feel my inner fire burning bright again.

The words I say to myself and hear in my head are old news, they aren’t true and I can prove them wrong if I can learn to be kind.

Those old stories have a past and they might be buried but they rise and become my present stopping me in my tracks and holding me back.

Now when they rise I call them out. I don’t stuff them down or swallow them, I acknowledge them and I use everything in my power to release them and soften their intensity.

I breathe.

I listen.

I tap.

I feel it all. 

I breathe to feel fully present in my body and not caught up in my head.

I listen with patience, acceptance and compassion.

I tap on the negative thoughts to shift the narrative.

I help myself feel safe and nurtured as I let my feelings come up.

I am the change I want to see in my life.

It starts with me. 

Recognising negative self-talk, changing the narrative, and releasing its intensity is something I work on daily, my thoughts are the biggest part of the inner work and it's what I'm here to help others with too. 

To learn more about what I do and how I help clients release physical and emotional pain through mindfulness, movement and EFT, follow the link to my 1-1 wellness sessions.

For now my friend, big love,
Becki x