Simple Solutions to Relieve Stress and Soothe Your Nervous System
How to make self-care a non-negotiable priority in your life
There's one problem with coming on a retreat with me.
It doesn’t last.
There’s no doubt the sparkle you get in your eyes and the softness you feel in your shoulders. There’s an afterglow that follows you out the door, the magic of the day spilling out over your weekend but the inevitable always happens…
The work day begins.
Your teenager starts pushing your buttons.
Your back starts to ache and your shoulders begin to creep ever closer to your ears.
What’s the point in splurging on a day for yourself for it to wear off in a few days?
I always check in on people the day after our time together and again a few days later. The responses vary but tend to go a little like this…
The day after:
“It was like I was floating on a cloud, I felt a sense of serene calm and I can’t believe that was just from a few hours of ME time!”
Three days later:
“I was feeling really calm but then I started work and you know, life got in the way.”
Rest and self-care are essential
Most of us don’t feel we have much control over the time we have, and what we do have never seems to be enough.
Rest and self-care are essential, they need to be consistent and grounding, like an anchor, but the practices we choose get to be personal and seasonal.
When you take care of yourself physically, mentally and emotionally, life feels better.
You feel healthier, you sleep better and you have better relationships with the people around you.
Well-being is multi-layered, like the most delicious piece of chocolate cake.
Sadly we can’t live on retreat but perhaps I can offer you some simpler ways to escape and reconnect…
I understand the struggle to maintain that sense of peace and serenity after a retreat. It's disappointing when the stresses of daily life quickly take over, and it can feel like the rejuvenation from your time away is fleeting.
Life's demands can make it challenging to hold onto that inner peace. It's understandable to feel like we have little control over the time we have for ourselves, and it never seems like enough.
Incorporating rest into daily life
Rest is something I prioritise after years of feeling burned out and frayed at my edges but resting is a rare reward most of us treat ourselves to. Realising only I could change my state of being made me take radical responsibility for my health and state of mind. I began incorporating rest in simple ways daily whether taking a walk in the trees or by water, sitting outside without my phone and a cup of tea, writing, reading, being on my yoga mat, or pottering in the garden.
…Or, as my dear friend proudly confessed to me, spending the afternoon pondering the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle!
Simple Solutions to Relieve Stress and Improve Self-Care.
This is about reclaiming some of your day for YOU.
Creating snippets
I appreciate there will be days when grabbing some lunch or even going for a wee will feel like a luxury but we are aware of how essential both are for our health! That loo break could be the first opportunity for you to take a breath. Breath work on the loo or at the sink is hardly revolutionary but it's a realistic habit to try.
My tea drinking enables a lot of procrastination but I am more mindful of this now and use the time while the kettle is boiling to stretch and shake things off. We all know the power of walking or running to clear your head. I began taking the scenic route to do the weekly shop, getting my steps in and a change of scenery makes me feel regulated and in a clearer state of mind. Avoid this if you’re in a rush, this is about stretching out time and being present not flustered!
What practices, types of self-care, and rest feel good to you?
Where can you slot them in, creating short and sweet snippets of time for yourself?
Mini practices like the ones in my journal can help you form effortless and mindful habits on the go.
Instead of scrolling mindlessly through social media any time you get a chance, put your phone down and get a change of scene.
Do one small thing to bring you back to yourself.
2. Bookending your day
About 8 years ago, I started practicing mindfulness in a small way every day because I desperately needed something to focus my mind and help ease my anxiety.
Every morning I’d drag myself out of bed to sit on my yoga mat and breathe for 5 minutes. I simply practiced diaphragmatic breathing, using a regular breath count of 4:4 (inhale through your nose for four, out through the nose of mouth for four) to regulate my body before a hectic day at work.
After a couple of weeks, the drag became a more promising "roll” from bed as my practice became more familiar and the benefits became increasingly obvious.
Not everyone likes the idea of a morning ritual, it sounds all too spiritual but personally, I LOVE it. If you do too, why not try my Self-Connection meditation first thing in the morning to set you up for the day? You can download it here for free.
Unless you have removed yourself entirely from our society that rewards busyness, you’ll have some form of routine in the morning. Is it rushed?
Does it tend to your needs ahead of everyone else’s?
Does it set you up for the day in a calm, focused, and positive frame of mind?
In our fast-paced, modern lives, it's all too easy to become distracted and detached from the present-moment experience. The morning set the scene for the day. The chances are if it starts in a rush you’ll feel as though you’re playing catch-up for the rest of the day. Begin your day with a few minutes for yourself and regulate your nervous system and you’ll be receiving the benefits throughout your day.
How you end the day is important too. The transition from work to home can feel jarring and even stressful depending on your commute. Bookending the workday allows space to pause and switch gears. Maybe it's the gym after work or yoga with me online when working from home, perhaps it's a podcast or a book instead of scrolling through social media. These tweaks to your existing habits and routine will offer some much-needed downtime for your senses.
3. Remixing your routine
Different days will call for different tools and self-care is about picking up on the signals your body gives you responding with supportive practices and tapping into your inner resources.
Getting in the habit of taking care of yourself takes time and you’ve got to carve out the time. Make self-care relevant to how you live and to the work you do.
What times of day are you most energised or feel most tired?
What times of the month or year are you busier, work is most hectic, etc?
Only you know you and your lifestyle best so you get to choose what you need, when you need it, and how you do it.
What time of the day/week are you comfortable setting time aside for yourself?
What do you already enjoy doing, can you do it more often?
What habits can you make more mindful and nourishing as an act of self-preservation?
4. Rest is productive
Radical Rest is about making self-care a non-negotiable priority in our lives, beyond the transient trends and curated illusions of social media. It is a conscious act of self-preservation, allowing our bodies and minds to repair, rebalance, and restore.
By incorporating intentional practices of physical, mental, emotional, sensory, social, creative, and spiritual rest into our routines, we can cultivate a profound sense of calm, gratitude, and self-confidence. When we nurture ourselves consistently, we experience improved sleep, clearer skin, stronger bodies, and supercharged creativity.
Most importantly, we become more present, make better decisions, and navigate life's stresses with greater ease. Mental rest and sensory rest are possibly the most underrated and unappreciated forms of rest we need. There’s more to switching off than unplugging but it’s a good place to start. You can read more about “Learning To Rest”, here.
5. Setting intentions to live by
Without an intention, there’s no movement toward your goals and aspirations. Setting yourself an intention that feels positive and personal is the inspiration behind your actions and keeps things flowing.
Mindfulness is the ultimate act of self-love and when you become more aware of your emotions and reactions you’ll be able to look ahead putting things in place to support yourself better when a work project takes up all of your time or you need to drop everything to support a friend or loved one.
Feel your best, be less stressed & regulate your body
There’s a lot to be said for having something to look forward to and carving out the time for yourself to fully switch off, zone in, and recalibrate. Workshops and retreats will always be an option offering you a way to escape. Spending a day being looked after by someone else for a change, fully aware you made that conscious choice and investment.
I am immensely grateful I get to soothe worn-out nervous systems for a few hours and I hope that some of that goodness will seep into the seams of everyday life.
Life is so full-on it’s easy to lose touch with switching off. Join me for our next full-day retreat in London, this retreat is a call to SLOW DOWN, tune in, and rest. As we approach the Autumn Equinox, we can invite ourselves to explore new ways of reconnecting and being. It will be the perfect time to replenish your energy, renew your intentions, and rediscover your focus.
I will create a calming dreamscape for you, my friend, and share practices and techniques to blend with the reality of modern life. REST will be the highlight of the day incorporating soothing practices to regulate your nervous system and reconnect you to your WHOLE self. My intention is for you to leave with the resources to sustain your soothed state.
Take care of yourself, prioritise rest, and take a breather, my friend.
You deserve it.
Big Love,
Becki x